pullin' the trigger...

We triggered last night at 9:15.  We were watching Family Guy and luckily B looked at the clock at 9:14...yikes.  Does that already make me a bad mother? Probably.  But c'mon, Family Guy is glorious!

So the shot didn't hurt at all again, I love that.  The stim shots definitely burn as they're going in.  I rubbed it right afterward to help the medicine disperse and then I put some heat on it for a bit.  That's what the instruction paper told me to do, so I did it.  I can't remember whether I did that last time or not, but I did it.

Well, I woke up at 4am and it was really sore in the injection site.  I felt it and had a rather large knot under my skin right where the HCG went in.  So, of course, I panicked.  I've got more hormones in my body than what's natural and apparently finding a lump under your skin where the all important HCG was suppose to disperse is the biggest f'ing deal ever at 4am.  My heart actually started racing.

I went to the bathroom and tried to tell myself that it did disperse, it just made a nice little knot under my skin because that's how it works with HCG.  Somehow I fell back asleep until 6:30.  At which point I woke up and felt again...still there, but a little smaller. 

Then at 7am, then 7:30.  B got up and went to work.  I tried to stay asleep...to no avail.  Finally at 8:15 I got out of bed.

So the knot is much smaller now, it still hurts.  I called Dr. Z's office to ask about it and left a message. 

Paranoia much?

I'm guessing this is perfectly fine.  I honestly can't for the life of me remember the last time.  Maybe it did this exact thing and it wasn't a big deal.  Or maybe it was supposed to dissipate and it didn't and they're going to retrieve a bunch of immature follicles because the HCG didn't get to them...

I'm a mess.  Thank God B hasn't left me.

Anyway- I'm really not too scared, I just want to make sure.  Other than that things are going well!  Feeling cautiously optimistic :)

Oh wait- did I tell you that Dr. Z isn't doing my retrieval???  Yeah, mini panic crisis from yesterday.  Dr. Z let us know that he has jury duty and Dr. L will be doing our retrieval.  I almost started crying immediately.  I'm hormonal.    F.

He saw the sheer terror in my eyes and assured me that he would never leave me with someone he wasn't 100% confident in.  He said it took him 6 years to find a partner that was good enough.  I met Dr. L in the hallway about a month ago. He just joined the practice right after our last IVF debacle, so I'd never met him before.  It was super awkward, one of those "oh hey, I'm Dr. L! I work here now...let me shake your hand while other women are walking through so we have to move over and get out of the way...you just got violated in the other room? Great! So great to meet you!"

He seemed nice enough.  But nice doesn't cut it when you're extracting unimaginably fragile follicles from my ovaries.  But, alas, I can't change it.  I asked my acupuncturist about him and apparently he's fantastic.  He worked at another practice around town (the place we went for our first opinion) after he moved here from somewhere like Virginia or something... he's been doing this for a while and honestly, Dr. Z would be an idiot to bring on someone who could lower his ridiculously good success rates.  So I guess I'm ok with it. 

I did, however, ask Dr. Z if he "knew" about us.  Whether he "knew" about the last round and whether he "knew" we weren't "normal".  Dr. Z kind of laughed and said yes but then he said "I wouldn't say you're not normal" at which point I think I gave him the death stare and repeated, "oh, we're not normal. Oh no, not normal. We're ok with that. We've accepted it."  He laughed. I just stared.

My lord, I'm one of those people. 

Whatever, if anything even remotely similar to the last round happens again I'm going to burn that...ok, nevermind. I'll just be very disappointed.  Big girl words, use my big girl words.

This cycle is going oh so differently and I'm very happy about that.  I'm feeling a little hormonal and this is definitely a better place to let loose than at my husband...my poor, innocent, victim of a husband.

Ok- I'm going to a baseball game today! An old friend from college is in town with her husband for spring training.  So we're going to go watch him play!  Oh, and I went and saw "No Strings Attached" yesterday with my best friend...and it was lovely.  I hate to admit that because I'm just such a sap for chick flicks and most of the time that's not a good thing to say about someone...but it's damn true and this one was particularly good in my book.  It could be the hormones, but I wanted to jump right into this move and roll around in it.  It was...lovely.